Entries for September, 2005
want to share an email from a friend..
post break-ups do's and dont's
yah heard me right.. hihihi.. read and digest it. period.
So you gave your sweetie your heart, only to have it carelessly tossed aside? We’ve all been there—and it stinks. "Not only is your heart hurt, but your pride is wounded" -- But you can bounce back from a one-sided breakup and be a stronger person for it. Here, the rules of rising above it all…
Do wallow in your misery—a little
The fact is, you just suffered a loss. And it’s completely OK — in fact, it’s normal — to want to grieve. So don’t feel bad about feeling bad. Go ahead and declare a mental-health weekend and be as emotional as you darn well please.
You know that friend who swoops in as soon as misfortune hits? The one who’s probably already called to swap relationship horror stories or emailed you that news story (since proven to be false!) about how you’re more likely to get hit with a truck than get married after age 35 or so. The secret to your survival is giving this Misery Loves Company bud the kiss-off. Negative friends tend to dwell on all the gory details of the breakup, causing you to relive it. Instead, spend time with your sunniest pals. Positive people will energize you, help you break that negative thought cycle, and will re-introduce fun into your life to help you move on.
Don’t try to be friends
It’s hard to go cold turkey when separating from your former love—so hard, in fact, that you may be tempted to go the “just buddies” route. But to move on, you need a clean (read: Zero contact) break. Men and women can't be friends post-breakup because there is always a sexual tension, and in weak moments, one or both parties give way to desire. And who wants to turn into someone’s booty call? If you are a guy, the woman will add you to her collection of beck-and-call, last-minute dates. If you are a woman, the guy will keep you as a back-up for those lonely nights when he's looking for ‘comfort’ without commitment. Parting ways, on the other hand, paves the way for a fresh love in your life. .If you're serious about being in a good relationship, don't clutter your life with men who aren't Mr. Right.
Do treat yourself really, really well
Since your best friend can’t be there 24/7 to tell you you’re amazing, shower yourself with the TLC that you deserve. Cheer yourself up.
Do hang with a buddy of the opposite sex
Don’t worry — we’re not suggesting a rebound one - nighter. Rather, we’re floating the idea that hanging out with this kind of pal can help restore your banged-up ego in a big way. For women, a guy pal won’t rehash the drama, but will give you a few choice words that will break through the clouds. Also, because he is a male, you will feel that you are getting the guy point of view when he compliments you and boosts your self-esteem. And for guys, a female friend can offer all kinds of insight—and make you feel really cared for. Who knows? There might even be fringe benefits. [this one is certified true.. as for my experience. hehehehe.]
Don’t drunk-dial
Avoid this horrible habit in which alcohol lures you into making “Hey, want to get together?” calls to your ex and your self-esteem will thank you in the morning. Which is the problem: You never get the guy off your brain (or your speed-dial). Here’s how to stop drinking and dialing: Erase his number from your memory settings, and ask a friend to be your intervention counselor, ready to take your call at 3 A.M. when you’re tempted to ring up your ex. [hahaha. laugh trip at 3am.. familiar!]
Don’t call him when you’re sober either
Dialing when you’re not under the influence can be even worse, because you can’t blame it on the margaritas. And if you’re hoping for reconciliation, it’s counterproductive: How is he going to miss you if he’s still getting your daily calls and emails? Calling will give someone the space to miss you. And even if reconciliation isn’t your fondest hope and dream, at least you’ll retain your dignity.
Don’t ask, “Why?”
Face it: You’re not going to get closure from the person who broke things off. Closure requires getting truthful answers to your questions about what happened. At this upsetting time, usually no one really understands why things fell apart and neither party is prepared to tell the truth, even if they know what it is. Neither wants to actually hear the truth, either. Thus, initiating one final conversation—and then another—is just asking for pain. No answer can satisfy you, that's for sure.
Do something creative
When something destructive happens in your life, create something to restore the balance. Creativity is a wonderful way to heal your broken heart. You get passionate and fall in love with a project—and in the process, you create not only a satisfying outcome, but you also fall in love with your own ability and ultimately, yourself. When you love yourself, you are ready to love another! There’s only one rule: Don’t create a life-sized bust of him or a blog updating your revenge plans. Better bets: Bake cookies, plant an English garden, sign up for a pottery class, take black-and-white photos of your pooch, retile your bathroom—the possibilities are as endless as your imagination. [or buy a coloring book and finish it with your friends.. hahahaha. that was a fun experience!]
Do rearrange your bedroom
Every time you see that Asian flower-patterned bedding, you’re going to remember a night with the ex. So stash that set at the back of your closet and treat yourself to new bedding that you love and strongly suspect your former love would hate. Then move the bed to the opposite side of the room. It’s all about creating new rituals. Invite happiness.
Do take the long view
Don’t perceive yourself as being dumped, which is bound to deflate your ego and hardly represents the full story about your romance. Look at it this way; your journey with this person has ended. Some relationships have beginnings, middles and ends. You two had a nice run. But now that this romance has run its course, you’re that much closer to finding the kind of true love that never ends.
Written by hotchiqqa at 09:25 AM.
i dont understand people.. - csi l.v.
me either.. everyone's and everything's confusing.. minsan pa ang shitty.. just plain shit. and so i wish i was bLind.. so i couLdnt see the things people do to one another.. so i can stay innocent and just be happy in the dark.. but then i saw the sunset.. never made me feel contented with what i have.. i was lucky.
or so i thought... then i wished i was deaf.. so i couldnt hear any bad/foul words from people.. so i can be at peace anytime of the day.. even through all the noise of the world.. but then i hear children's laughter.. and the voice of my love one.. life can never be more perfect. 
Written by hotchiqqa at 08:43 PM.
ceLebrated our anniv with family and friends. sweet. attended mass with the gang last sunday, went to ruins to eat and buy some things. then by monday, had class til 4, went to sm manila to have our pictures mosaic[ed].. for a gift. then met him up at the fx terminal because we're goin to have dinner with his family at bora. ughhh. sobrang busog ako.. ang sikip pa nmn ng pants ko that night. haha. terrible. then he walked me home, he didnt want to leave. i didnt want him to. so we just talked and hold each other. but i shoo him out.. hahaha. before he falls asleep at our living room. next morning, sinundo nya ko tapos hinatid nya ko for my class. sobrang sweet. ehehehe. at shmpre binaunan nnmn nya ako ng chocolates and my fave, lemon square cheesecupcake! hehehehe. last week, he brought me lunch. soooo sweet! hehehe.
did i tell you that i already had 3 piano recitals this year? im still shocked that i had 3! but im doing good. i havent enrolled for another 12 lessons since finals is coming up and the school manual thing isnt even on its 50%. boo hoo. what am i gonna do..? i think marge n lj are doing good. im in hell.. school manual view. hahaha. whatever, i can do it. i know. but then i miss my piano lessons. mom says il still enroll kasi sayang nmn ung mga pinagaralan ko for december. ehhh... ako din nanghihinayang dahil sobrang hirap nun ah.. ohmygolly.. sonatina is a sonatina. memorizing it is just half of the ordeal. goin through every little detail of it, its just makes me insane. pero with out it, im crazier. duhh. im loving it. that simple.
i was caught on cam. haha. i didnt get to see the show but honey and his older bro did. i was like reading at powerbooks after my recital with my mom. i know that there was some kid show recording that day at powerbooks, but i never thought they would include random readers there. so whatever. enough bout it. small deal, whatever. hahaha.
Written by hotchiqqa at 09:26 AM.
discontentment... A Promise (Psalm 17:15)
"But as for me, my contentment is not in wealth but in seeing you and knowing all is well between us. And when I awake in heaven, I will be fully satisfied, for I will see you face to face."
cheating/dishonesty... A warning (luke 16:10-12)
"Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. so if you have not been trustworthy in handling wordly wealth, who will trust you with true riches? and if you have not been trustworthy with someone else's property, who will give you property of your own."
guidance... A promise (Psalm 32:8)
"I will instruct you and teach in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you."
...Amen to God. 
Written by hotchiqqa at 11:55 AM.
